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italbeans: A Tale

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Post  Patty Fri Jan 07, 2011 5:05 am

Had the time of my life playing Black Ops today.

I was playing Sharpshooter, and dominating. There was a kid in the lobby named italbeans, and he bitched about every death, and came in last place almost every game. I started telling him to shut up, because he was really getting on my nerves. He accused me of having a lag switch, and kept calling me "son" and "kid". He couldn't have been older than 14. After a number of games, he asked me to do a private match to see who was really better. His KDR is 0.41, and his WLR is 0.25. I wasn't too worried.

I accept his invite, to a TDM on nuketown. The game starts, and not to my surprise, we're using L96s. I get up 20-5 quickscoping him, and if I hit him on the first shot, he would accuse me of having an aimbot and scream. He didn't turn off killstreaks for some reason, and I got all of mine. Blackbird, Chopper Gunner, and Dogs. Eventually he got so frustrated that he took out his pistols and started owning me with them. There was minimal health on, so I had no chance.

Killstreak tiem

Call my dogs, they get him 3-4 times. Chopper gunner gets him once. Blackbird leads to more kills with my sniper rifle. He tells me that his uncle works for Microsoft, and that I'm gonna get banned for 3-6 weeks for using an aimbot. I kept insulting him, and he kept getting angrier. He accused me of tampering with the game, I said I would tamper with his asshole. Things like that. troll

All in all, I'm super scared that I'm gonna get banned for cheating, because I fucking demolished some 14 year old kid in a match that he hosted, with guns and perks of his choice.

Look up this kid's gamertag, and send him a message or look at his stats. Have a good chuckle.
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Post  EvanErgo Fri Jan 07, 2011 5:26 am

MS wont do anything about that. The most he could claim foul language but then he would probably be banned too.

You have nothing to fear of a teenage who claims his uncle (why is it always their uncle) works for MS. I've had that a few times in MW2. Nothing happens if you didn't do anything.
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Post  Patty Fri Jan 07, 2011 5:28 am

>sarcasm

I'm not scared lol
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Post  EvanErgo Fri Jan 07, 2011 5:39 am

Murr. How do you find these people. I can find annoying people but haven't come across one that annoying in a while.
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Post  MegaMonkeyChunk Fri Jan 07, 2011 5:46 am

The kid was probably a a fucking guido with a name like italbeans. Having lived my life with that generic stereotype even though I don't demonstrate guido-esque behavior, I seriously hate actual guido for making Italians look bad. They deserve to have their gel out hair shoved up their asses and left in a tanning bed until they shrivel up and die.
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Post  Patty Fri Jan 07, 2011 12:23 pm

Monkey I bet you really love Jersey Shore
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Post  MegaMonkeyChunk Fri Jan 07, 2011 10:04 pm

Patty wrote:Monkey I bet you really love Jersey Shore

If I had the choice of killing Hitler and reversing the whole Second World War or making sure Jersey Shore never existed, I'd take the latter.
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